Trust His Heart

There is a song that I love by Pat Barrett. It’s titled ‘Canvas and the Clay’. The song expresses that God is an Artist and a Potter. And WE are the Canvas and the Clay.

Just Beautiful. ❤

He knows our whole story. And He is shaping and molding and painting as He sees fit.

Yet somehow, I forgot the fact that God – in all His Sovereign Power – has the ability to provide things in my life that I didn’t ask for.

To shape my story.

Recently He hit me a doozy!!!!

And it has re-shaped my understanding of God………in an amazing way.

God’s love through Divine Provision

Whenever God blessed me with something before, I never saw it as if He did it because He loved me. I would only see that He did it because I asked for it and had Faith that He would do it.

Sigh…..I never even realized what a poor mindset that was to have!

But now I am seeing something that I did not specifically ask for being manifested.

And amazingly………….all I can see……..IS GOD’S LOVE.

That’s why He did it.

Not because I asked.

Or because I deserved it.

Not because I stood in faith that it would happen. (I was completely terrified at first! I couldn’t understand WHY God would send this NOW!!!)

But I had to let go and trust Him. Completely.

And face my fears.

And on the other side………..I found the love of my Heavenly Father.

I understand so many things about Him better now……it’s crazy!!!!

But I love it. 😊🙌❤

God loves you!! And He knows what is best for you right now. He also knows when to give you what you have been asking for.

So………in this season, try asking God to help you trust His Heart. And not only seek His Hand.

Strong Foundation

Last night I watched the movie God’s not Dead 2. I’ve seen it before but last night I felt like that was the one to watch.

In the movie there is a character that had cancer but is miraculously healed from it. So at the beginning of the show she is telling her friend that the cancer is gone and he is praising and giving glory to God! But she seems to be just in a state of……shock I guess.

The movie is a great story about a Christian teacher that gets asked a question about Jesus while in class and chooses to answer it. This however results in a massive court case because sharing your faith or ‘proselytizing’ as they called it is against the law in America. (Side note: I must say that it makes me appreciate the Caribbean! Because such a situation would not have been such a serious issue here 🙌.)

But I digress………

It goes to show the direction that the World as a whole will be following. Their agenda is to push Christianity out of EVERYTHING. And make Christians the enemy.

My reason for writing however is not to share my opinion on this particular topic. Though as a Christian, the movie truly challenged my faith to stand no matter the circumstance or consequence! But my reason for writing is a statement that was made by the woman who was healed from cancer:

I am paraphrasing, but she basically said that

“While I was sick, I had all the faith that Jesus would heal me. But now that He has done it……I find myself questioning everything.”

I couldn’t understand her at that point in time last night. I mean, healing is amazing!! Why question your faith AFTER??? 🤷‍♀️

But today while doing Bible Study, God reminded me of the lady. And He showed me that I am going through a very similar experience to her right now!

I was once in spiritual bondage, especially mentally. And God revealed my situation to my leaders at church and they fought and warred against the enemy on my behalf!! And because of their willingness to help me and their complete obedience to God……I AM FREE!!!

But you know what the amazing thing is?????

Although I am now free, I question my faith more now……than I did when I was in bondage.

When I was still bound and fighting for my sanity every single day, I had faith in God that could move mountains!! I was determined that the devil would not win! That he would get no glory and his plan would fail!!!! 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

And then, amazingly, I was free.

And the emotions or feelings I thought that I would have felt just wasn’t there.

I kept looking over my shoulder expecting the devil to show up again. I’ve been tormented in my mind by old fears and anxieties. I have good days and then days where I am wondering if I am free at all! I have been constantly beating myself up for my past mistakes, holding on to past mindsets, looking back on how strong I used to be and wondering why I feel so weak NOW. 😫

I’m just like that lady in the movie.


So now that we (me and the lady) have nothing to fight, there seems to be no reason to keep trusting God. No reason to be thankful each day. No reason to hold on for dear life!

Why are we humans like this???!!

Why are we so quick to turn our backs on God and sin against Him through Doubts and Fears???!!!!


I wish I had the answer to that question.
But I really don’t. I don’t know why we do it.

But I know what I am going to do now that I see the wrong of my ways.

I am going to PUT IN THE WORK.
The Lord gave me the idea to turn my 2nd spare bedroom into a Prayer Room. And I am in here right now STUDYING THE WORD. Learning more about God – who He is, His amazing power, His matchless works and what Jesus did for me.

Because its apparent that my foundation is lacking.

And so I’m going back to basics. Genesis chapter 1 – Creation. And I will work my way up from there.

Don’t let pride stop you from starting over. None of us knows everything!

We all have to ensure that we have a strong foundation.

What do you plan to do to ensure that your foundation in Christ is unshakeable?

Matthew 7:24‭-‬25 ESV
Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. 

The Power of Choice – Time to Fight Back

It’s amazing how much we take our freedom to choose for granted.

Too easily ………..we just give it away!

“What do I mean?? 🤔”

Ok lemme break it down for you….



I’ll explain by giving an example:

Eve gave away her freedom in the Garden of Eden.

She had the power of choice to tell the devil NO!!! But instead, she listened to the wrong counsel …..and the rest is History.

A mistake that we all pay for today.

And we condemn her constantly for it! (especially us Ladies!! 😒)

But………..what if we understood that our own mistakes could have this much impact on the future?!……

Maybe if we knew this, we would be alot more cautious about what we choose to believe!

We wouldn’t believe the cunning lies of the enemy. Telling us that we ‘don’t have to’ do what God told us to do.

And we wouldn’t give our freedom (future or present) away…….


Some weeks ago I saw a post making fun of the fact that after 4 hours of fasting, your ‘stomach’ tells you that you have fasted long enough, and you can go eat now.

And in scrolling through the comments, many other persons could identify with giving into their stomach!

But what if God told you to fast? Shouldn’t you complete the assignment? 🤔

In reality the post was meant as a joke, but really and truly……’s NOT funny!! Disobedience to God is no joke.

We are still paying for Adam and Eve’s disobedience today.

My Disobedience

It may have seemed as if I was just going to bash all of those persons who commented on the post and said “Me too!”, but honestly I am writing to convict my own heart.

I have been disobedient.

God’s Word says that ‘The just shall live by faith’. But I have been struggling to have faith in God.

The enemy’s lies and present threats always seem so much louder than God’s promises for the future!!!!!!


But NONE of them are bigger than my God!!!!! He is the reason why I am still here today.

So this morning, I woke up and had to put the devil in his place!!!!! (Any Caribbean person would understand what I mean by this 😠).

The devil was trying to give me a dream totally outside of God’s will for my life. So instead of giving in to the sexual temptation…….

I woke up, rebuked the devil and told him to get the HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE AND MY MIND!!!!!

We cannot allow the enemy room in our lives. Because then, we give up the freedom that God has given to us.

That dream would have led to me being in spiritual bondage if I had let it slide. And quite frankly, I’ve already been there and have NO intentions of going back!!!!!!


I know this is a long post but……

I am not playing anymore.

And I know I am not alone in this. So if the enemy has been trying to bring back your past,

It is time to remind him of HIS future!!!!

In the end, the devil LOSES!! And I have no plans on joining him. So he is gonna have to ‘know his place’! And it is NOT in my life.

Stand up, be bold and take authority.

Full stop.


On Saturday 13th July, I made the greatest step of my life………..

Into Water Baptism.

This is me before I left home. I intentionally wore my ‘Faith over Feelings’ hoodie as a reminder to myself to walk by Faith and not by sight!

That morning I woke up at 5 a.m. to get ready and the weight of it all hit me and I started to cry!!!! 😭

I saw this next step as the complete end of the old experiences – the torment, the fears, the anxiety – and the beginning of my new walk with God into whatever He wanted for me.


He did it!!! He carried me through the storm and now I was finally at the end of that part of the journey.

It was finally OVER! 😭😭😭😭

When I got to church, the excitement was so great that we couldn’t help but take selfies 😄. And then we got up and began to sing songs of victory while we marched around the chairs!!!! 😁💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃

It was such a beautiful morning!

The rains came down while we were at the site and yet it couldn’t hamper our mood or determination to complete this assignment.

We were going to get Baptized!

Gorgeous isn’t it!!!!

I still couldn’t keep back the tears when we were there. I was just so grateful to God for bringing me this far!

It really had not been an easy journey but I know without a doubt that it was ALL WORTH IT.


Being baptized was the greatest feeling I have ever had.

I am now truly part of the Bride of Christ. I am part of the church that He will be returning for. The one without spot or blemish.

I am Redeemed.

I am Forgiven.

I am Loved.

I am made NEW!!!! A new creation in His sight.



It’s so AMAZING!!!!

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.

2 Corinthians 5:17 ESV

Now on to the next Chapter of my life………..

New Beginnings.

Safe in His arms – Hearing God

Have you ever been afraid to hear the voice of God?

Sounds strange right?!!!

Sighhhhh……… I really don’t know if I am the only person to ever struggle with this but……..

Honestly …….I’m afraid to hear His voice. 😰

And I guess when I really think about it, the reason for being afraid……………is that I am afraid of hearing the wrong voice.


Now don’t get me wrong. I have heard Him before! So this is not a blog questioning whether or not He speaks.


I am sure of it.

Continue reading “Safe in His arms – Hearing God”